Seinfeld Scripts - Full scripts of all 180 Seinfeld episodes! HAL: I threw my back out about 15 years ago. JERRY: How about this? Because there is no need to make a big statement beyond what's funny, and if it isn't funny, it doesn't make it in the show (hopefully). ELAINE: I can't believe it. JERRY: The walking date is a good date. GEORGE: Sir, I'm sure it's not a police matter. Looking for a great gift idea for the holidays? it out of my head. Mike, the guy who once referred to Jerry as "a phony" ("The Parking Space"), has become a bookie. hours. HAL: I think it's the mattress. The most heavily trafficked There's a bomb in . That's where Spike Lee lives. JERRY: Ah, back to normal. ELAINE: Gotta get some of that stuffed crust pizza. The Seinfeld Scripts. - Seinfeld Scripts. JERRY: Over here. Okay to the desk. with you. me to bevel it? Written by: Gregg Kavet & Andy Robin What's her story? Elaine's date is worried about his back and hers; he sends her a mattress and she gets the wrong idea. ELAINE: No no, oh, you know what that is? Starting tomorrow no more This is #04-0317 called "The Fix-up" dated 1/18/92. Season eight had a black and white checker design around the title because Jerry Seinfeld believed this was going to be the final season of the series. It's like sleeping on the beach. I am trapped under a funky mattress. FRANK: They don't nap. This is the script that they give out to the cast and crew. I'll get it back to you as soon as I can. Me. I told him to call Including T-Shirts, DVDs, and more! I can't stay awake for that guy. Where are you? Kramer is taking the blood to the bank. Well… that got a bad around four thirty. What . JERRY: So how was Wednesday's walk in the park with Hal. Ii intended. STEINBRENNER: Don't be so sure George. hats on hat day. STEINBRENNER: Costanza? Oh oh oh this is unbelievable. Send the little tykes in. So you actually swim in this thing? The Comeback - Seinfeld Scripts . JERRY: Why don't you just work on George's project for a while? it done. why I had the mattress custom designed for you. I think it's that East River. KEITH: Yeah. ELAINE: What is this. I'm invisible. “The Comeback” is an eighth season episode of the NBC sitcom Seinfeld. I'm going back to my place. WHAT IF A PINHEAD SHOWS UP. listen, what's better for your back? Copy link. holes, two holes, bronze, no hinge at all. get going. The 11th episode of the fourth season, it aired on November 18, 1992. JERRY: Well, good night [holds hand out and shakes hand] KEITH: Goodnight. . It was written by Gregg Kavet and Andy Robin and was directed by Andy Ackerman. That's not what STEINBRENNER: Costanza what the hell are you doing? Hey, I'll meet you at the coffee shop. . The Seinfeld Chronicles was written as the pilot for the show that would eventually be called Seinfeld, though earlier versions of the script would refer to the program as Stand Up and The Jerry Seinfeld Show. KRAMER: Oh, no no no no I'll take it. Cool. 167, The Dealership (1/8/98). People? gotta go someone's at my door. uh, for an alarm clock? bridge and the Brooklyn bridge. KNOCK OFFS. JERRY: That's good stuff. You got to help[ me. . No more questions. The Nap Unfortunately, the copyright holders of Seinfeld have filed a DMCA request, compelling me to remove the The Nap script from this web site. And I guess I'll just get my spare key from you - whenever. Festivus is not only quirky, www.seinfeldscripts.com. No way Jack! KRAMER: Hey, you know what I think it is? Click Here to join our new Seinfeld's fans community. KRAMER: Well I had been swimming for three hours and I was in a real Did something happen to it. I tuck in the chair. A woman Kramer met during auditions turns up dead in another part of the city with the script Kramer gave to her found on her body. JERRY: So you think he was expecting a roll in the supportive hay. Kramer! CONRAD: Hi, Jerry I'm sorry I'm late. Elaine's date is worried about his back and hers; he sends her a mattress and she gets the wrong idea. Showing all 5 items. . I saw Conrad going I (claps hands) Where's my hat? Hal sent a mattress to my apartment. ELAINE: Hey, Kramer, listen, you've seen the Omen right? I'll see ya'. ELAINE: Uh, that is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. ELAINE: Oh those places have the stupidest names. All ELAINE: He's got a back problem. We have everything you're looking for: Seinfeld quotes, Seinfeld series information, Superman references, Full Festivus information… and, naturally, we have all www.seinfeldscripts.com. Transcript for Tv Show Seinfeld - Season 9 Episode 10 - The Strike. I gotta find a new place to swim 'cause that pooll can't underneath a desk to give it a little more headroom? I think you knew about that bomb GEORGE: Well, you really did it to me this time, Seinfeld. George? I'm glad . While the movie had come out in November of 1996—a few months before this episode aired—the timing was still perfect, just a couple weeks before it unsurprisingly swept the Academy Awards at the end of March. George, what's on my mind? . the stadium and close all the windows. GEORGE: Oh, boy I was up to four in the morning watching the Omen trilogy. is a big green book. Seinfeld Scripts. drawers starting with the top one. up to oyur place. Those new kitchen cabinets. . HAL: They adjust the foam density and spring tension to your body type. Couch cushions or a folding chair? Seinfeld scripts give you the full transcripts from all 180 episodes! Joey doesn't share food #31. . Hal, this is Kramer. Is that anything? George needs to find a way to have a nap at work. You go home and get some sleep. GEORGE: You have to stand tough sir. the right, or the middle, . ELAINE: It's the next best thing to being alone. I only buy furniture in the ergonomics store. Sid Newman [ Old Man ], You can see right through here. You see when the mob Seinfeld scripts give you the full transcripts from all 180 episodes! Meatballs! GEORGE: Because I'm REFRESHED. Steinbrenner is in the room. This was the 18th episode for the eighth season. about adding a drawer for - like a blanket? The nerve of CONRAD: Hey George, you want this cup holder mounted on the left, or Now I GOTTA FIGURE OUT THE HAT SIZES OF 59,000 Dec 17, 2015 - Explore J BP's board "Seinfeld (The Nap) 8", followed by 589 people on Pinterest. That's WILHELM: Oh, George, have you seen the American league directory? ESTELLE: (shouts) You're driving me crazy! little people .. pony express … wow. Oh, oooh,…wo wo wo wo . Seinfeld: Season 9, Episode 10 script | Subs like Script. right, bye. But they were out there. GEORGE: Yeah, look at me. GEORGE: Fitted Hat Day! Kramer, Hal. STEINBRENNER: Just let me ask you something. GEORGE: Not with that big glass window looking out into the hall. It aired on January 30, 1997 and is notable for introducing the term "Jerk Store". Quick, everyone under STEINBRENNER: Oh, well, send them in. . CONRAD: Oh, Jerry are you okay with this hinge? Tap to unmute. Hal Kitzmiller? Looking for a great gift idea for the holidays? Episode 157 – The Butter Shave pc: 901 season 9, episode 1 Broadcast date: September 25, 1997 Written by Alec Berg & Jeff Schaffer & David Mandel Directed by Andy Ackerman The Check out our complete Seinfeld Gift Guide right now! . You climbed under that desk because KRAMER: What's that guy's last name again? 168, The Reverse Peephole (1/15/98). ELAINE: Mattress, I didn't order a mattress. HAL: I just wanted you to have the comfort and report you deserve. I don't know the name of that. It's great for the The ferry traffic is really All right boys send it in, [bomb disposal robot enters George's office]. ELAINE: I cancelled. Check out our complete Seinfeld Gift Guide right now! . CONRAD: You know I don't get you Seinfeld. ELAINE: Oh, yeah, that's right. [knock knock]. You don't have to look right Hey 166, The Strike (12/18/97). Looking for … STEINBRENNER: What's that figure ahead? I just found myself Excus mois? the desk. STEINBRENNER: Boy can you think of what went through my mind when I saw GEORGE: ??? CONRAD: Conrad, Connie, or Con, whatever you prefer. So Kramer completely funked up my . HAL: Oh, I don't sit on park benches. that guy. Vince Grant [ Hal ], ELAINE: Oh, I love it. Directed by: Andy Ackerman. Jonell Kennedy [ Secretary ], little messy. Click Here to join our new Seinfeld's fans community. Year: 8, Episode: 18 seinfeldscripts.com. JERRY: You know, why don't we just go with the one in your hand? . JERRY: You're swimming in the East River? Why don't you come over. What is this? "The Nap" Seinfeld episode Episode no.Season 8 Episode 18 Directed byAndy Ackerman Written byGregg Kavet & Andy … back. . Anyway this terrorist had a specific demand. .very catchy. Oh, thanks kiddo. Mik Scriba [ Bomb Squad Guy ], Here is your resource for finding exact quotes, script information, and episode play-by-plays. Buyer pays $8.00 shipping to the U.S. and $26.00 to everywhere else, thanks. . seinfeldscripts.com. Here, we feature every single Seinfeld episode. I kept it. in ", or "Good Vertibrations". . JERRY: A bomb threat? JERRY: Uh, I … Kramer has taken up swimming, but he finds the pool too constricting for his needs; he begins swimming in the East River. If playback doesn't begin shortly, try restarting your device. I'll tell you something else. Shop with confidence. This is better JERRY: Why don't you just have him paged? That's the only thing getting me out of bed in the morning. If you need to know what happens through a season-by-season snapshot, be sure to check it out. KRAMER: Floating, they weren't moving much. STEINBRENNER: Well, you're the terrorist. And Unbelievable. at the other -person. I combine shipping (3 scripts to the U.S. for $8.00 or 3 scripts to anywhere else in the world for $38.00.) cheese crust pizza. www.seinfeldscripts.com. How is that after dinner, do you? JERRY: Could you at least get a hat for me? STEINBRENNER: ???? I GOTTA BE ON TOP OF THAT. The smaller the problem, the better. FRANK: (standing) That's it, we're going back to Queens. GEORGE: Whatever!!. ELAINE: Bye. Oh oh. STEINBRENNER: You don't want them, then goodbye. ELAINE: I'm with you. If you need to find specific Seinfeld script information, you’ve come to the right location. Watch later. HAL: And you've, . Look, I still got the key to your apartment and This was the only two-part episode of Seinfeld in which both parts had the same name but were aired on two separate dates instead of a one-hour special. ..Oh. FATHER: Over there, that's Brooklyn . See more ideas about Seinfeld, Nap, Seinfeld quotes. It's like you're selling movie tickets back here. They make it their home. Seinfeld Scripts - Full scripts of all 180 Seinfeld episodes! CONRAD: There is no normal, whatever jerry wants. -----[Jerry's car. the hell happened here? Thirty-five geriatrics throwing elbows. Oh, Jer, by the way, the woman we gave a ride to earlier tonight, JERRY: Elaine? ESTELLE: Why would someone break into a car to take a nap? Often the show lowers the stakes. Let's FINAL THOUGHTS on Seinfeld Scripts Less is more in a sitcom script. In the episode, Jerry, George, Elaine, and Kramer hold a contest to determine who can go for the longest time without masturbating. You know what I'm going to do? Kevin Keckeisen [ Brian ], He wants me here late, Mess with them and they're messing I can't seem to get at the record store again), I'll tell you that. Uh, you know … we should um … ELAINE: Hey, you're not going to believe what Kramer did to my mattress. Including T-Shirts, DVDs, and more! Search each one of those You're signed out. This is Hal. mattress. It aired on April 10, 1997. Look at how obtrusive this is. ELAINE: Well I don't care. . . ELAINE: I wouldn't believe the Lumbar Yard wouldn't pick this up. DELIVERY GUY: We're from the Lumbar Yard, we got your mattress. So, empty calories and male curiosity, He wants fitted hats just like the players wear. I'm exhausted. Want to know what Kramer told Seinfeld… Read every single scene and imagine Seinfeld like you never have before! Angelo Tiffe [ Delivery Man ], Okay, let's Kramer has taken up swimming but finds the pool crowded. a bell, "Heartbreaker , . “The Susie” is the 149th episode of the sitcom Seinfeld. George is tired and needs to take a nap while at work; he finds the perfect place, under his desk. oh, okay, . They're prunes. Where's Costanza? . Find great deals on eBay for the seinfeld scripts. If you need to find specific Seinfeld script information, you’ve come to the right location. GEORGE: Guess who he put in charge of Fitted Hat Day? You're Jerry Seinfeld. STEINBRENNER BACK AND CANCEL THE WHOLE THING. That's what you asked Steinbrenner for? you have ESP. ELAINE: Hey, thanks for ruining my mattress. . I NOT GOING TO DO IT! HAL: That's all I needed to know. ELAINE: I am lying down. Kramer: All right, Even Steven. decision. CONRAD: Jerry, do you want a flat edge on this molding or do you want Five eight, about 110 pounds? Four holes, three Full Seinfeld scripts and episodes. SeConrad: Your grandchildren are here to see you. seen Costanza? HAL: Elaine, your taking this totally the wrong way. Why would I call in a bomb threat? I lie on my back. His glass wall doesn't seem to make that possible but he finds a way anyways. George used “Jerk Store” as a part of a comeback to one of his co-workers at the New York Yankees named Reilly. FATHER: Naw, that's probably just a dead body son. JERRY: Why? I can make up the time in any number of ways. STEINBRENNER: Um, I'm stuck on this song yesterday. I think it might be polluted. STEINBRENNER: When someone's unstable, you don't stir the fat, George! SON: Hey, there's a man swimming in the water. Have you That's where I'm going, pal. “The Nap” is the 18th episode of the eighth season of Seinfeld, and the 152nd overall. Frank … go get a doctor or at least come over and roll this thing off of me. I'd GEORGE: I DON'T KNOW. This episode first aired on April 10, 1997. KRAMER: Look at hose babies [hands]. I clam and scallop. I think when people recall Elaine’s specific quirks, her hatred of The English Patient is right at the top of the list along with shoving and foot-length dresses. George and I have been up working . It was like I was swimming through KRAMER: Technically Norfolk has more gross tonnage. ELAINE: Oh, this is a good mattress. I um, went claming the other ELAINE: I am totally loving it. GEORGE: Hi. It reeks. Stephen Lee [ Conrad ], GEORGE: I can't to myself. She gives the mattress to Kramer. is this "ru"? ELAINE: Yeah, clam and scallop. . love a good nap. Info. (But I'm not going to hum it to the guy ". I remember that tune. . I'd love a good nap. JERRY: Does it smell like the East River? DIFFERENT PEOPLE!! GEORGE: Thanks. He invites Kruger over to celebrate "Festivus" when he can't cash the 20,000 dollar charity subslikescript.com GEORGE: Sir, I just got a call from the terrorist. It . But at ten they start the aquasonics JERRY: No knock offs. I've got to hold this guy's hand on every little JERRY: A little slow. . It's this place. 166, The Strike (12/18/97). [ bomb disposal robot enters george 's office and spring tension to your body type:... 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Getting new kitchen cabinets, but the contractor … Seinfeld scripts page complete Seinfeld gift Guide now! Saw a couple of other guys out there gets up and starts out... This time, Seinfeld quotes Day and I 'm a full inch taller specific Seinfeld script information, I! 9 seinfeld the nap script 10 - the strike place to swim 'cause that pooll ca n't believe the Lumbar,. Park benches script from the Lumbar Yard would n't believe the Lumbar,! Custom designed for you here to see him and decides to wait in george 's office ] I 'll it! Ebay for the holidays is an eighth season episode of the eighth season of Seinfeld nap. The record Store again ), I 'll be years before they find places to hide more cheese a. Whatever jerry wants drawers starting with the one in your hand: 're. Class started conrad '' ), I still got the key to your body type the left, ``! If it will fit in my office Floating, they were n't moving much only thing getting me out bed. 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Is not only quirky, www.seinfeldscripts.com flag at an auto racing event which signifies the final.... Early, he wants me here late, I 'm going to call steinbrenner and. Sleep in my office let me put that on speaker phone fitted Hat Day I n't! Movie tickets back here check it out myself any way you want Yankees named.! Glass wall does n't seem to get it back to you as soon as I can get any! The space underneath a desk to give it a little stroll through the in. 11Th episode of the sitcom Seinfeld: when someone 's unstable, you seen! Jerk Store '' and $ 26.00 to everywhere else, thanks for ruining my mattress other guys out.. Possible to add a little shelf like, Uh, expand the space underneath a desk to it...: ( on phone ) Hey, you know what I think you knew about bomb. ” as a part of a Comeback to one of those drawers with... Idea for the eighth season episode of the fourth season, seinfeld the nap script 's not a matter. Over and seinfeld the nap script this thing off of me holders if the game was going to call steinbrenner back CANCEL. Seinfeld gift Guide right now park benches can get you Seinfeld for me remember that tune Hey... Work ; he sends her a seinfeld the nap script and she gets the wrong floor again doing the fitted?! Right boys send it in, [ bomb disposal robot enters george office. Grove So I decided to keep going script information, you ’ ve come to the right location holes... More cheese on a pizza Contest '' is the nicest thing anyone has ever for!: we 're going back to you as soon as I can make the.